silly state law saturday: vermont

This post is dedicated to my mother-in-law, who will soon make her annual trip to Vermont to see her lovely sister. I'm daring them to be outlaws! Picture it...like Thelma and Louise...

• It is a crime to intentionally kill a bird while flying a plane. If you've got that kind of aim, more power to ya.

• It is illegal to sell dogs and puppies along the side of the road. I guess cats are okay.

• Removing an ear tag from an animal is against the law. Just replace it with an earring, and no one will know.

• In Burlington, only dogs, cats, and ferrets can be brought into public parks. I wonder if the birds know about this law.

• In Burlington, it is a crime to feed the pigeons. So if you're really feeling rebellious, bring your pigeon food to the public park and see what happens.

• Shooting birds as a test of marksmanship is a crime. The Vermont prisons must be overrun with ten-year-old boys.

• At one time, it was illegal to tie a giraffe to a telephone pole. But now you can!

Come back next week when we visit Virginia!

An InLinkz Link-up

Law information source: stupidlaws.com, dumblaws.com, and realstrangelaws.com.

silly state law saturday: utah

I was really looking forward to learning about Utah's ridiculous animal laws because, well, you know. I can say that there are some very interesting ones I didn't include because they don't involve animals (thank goodness), but here are the ones that do:

• In Ogden, one cannot keep more than one cow. Poor, lonely cows.

• In Ogden, it is illegal to molest an animal confined on the owner's property unless you are a policeman or service official. Glad to know that policeman and service officials are above the law.

• It is considered an offense to hunt whales. Of course it is. 

• It is against the law to fish from horseback. Because the horse would scare away the fish, I presume?

• Birds have the right of way on all highways. This makes sense to me. Am I the only one who slams on their brakes for birds? 

• It is unlawful for vermin-infested material to stuff bedding or upholstery. Well, that's a relief. Glad they passed a law.

• In Milcreek Canyon, it is a crime to unleash your dog on even-numbered days. Better bring my calendar when I take the dogs out for a walk.

• Drunk-driving laws do not apply to a person riding an animal. If I ever move to Utah, I am so hitting the bars with a Great Dane.

Join us next week when we travel to Vermont!

An InLinkz Link-up

Law information source: stupidlaws.com, dumblaws.com, and realstrangelaws.com.

silly state law saturday: texas

Everything's bigger in Texas! Let's check out the size of their ridiculous animal laws.

• You may not tuck your pants into one boot unless you own ten or more cattle.  One boot? Must you own twenty cattle to tuck into both?

• It is legal for the blind to go hunting as long as they have someone with them who isn't blind. I'm thinking that the blind person and anyone stupid enough to go with him might not be the best hunting partners. 

• It is illegal to milk another person's cow. Is that a metaphor? I'll refrain.

• In Kingsville, two pigs may not have sex on the city's airport property. They prefer a menage a trios. 

• In Corpus Christie, it is illegal to raise alligators in your home. What a shame. I hear they make such sweet pets.

• In Texarkana, owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights. The most interesting part of this law is that there is actually a city called "Texarkana."

• Also in Texarkana, it is illegal to own a dingo, wallaby, or poison frog. Specifically.

• In Temple, no one may ride a horse and buggy through the town square. I hear the parking there is terrible, anyway.

• In Temple, you can ride your horse into a saloon. Then when you get drunk, you don't have to worry about mounting back up. And if you pass out, your horse can just take you home. This law should be widely adopted.

• Cattle thieves may be hanged on the spot. Great way to save taxpayer dollars.

• It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. You need to be in the top floor suite for that privilege.

• A dog may not be left unattended on a leash shorter than five times the length of the dog, measured nose to tail. Um...and who is going around measuring that?

• Emu feathers are allowed in mattresses. How exciting. I've always dreamed of owning an Emu mattress.

• In Texarcana, each cow is entitled to one acre for himself. I want to be a cow in Texas.

• Swine cannot be kept within 500 feet of a cemetery in counties with over 525,000 people. Always known to be a horrifying combination of factors.

• It's illegal to attack a service animal. I should think this would go without saying. 

• It is illegal to fish using electrical shock. I'm thinking the dummy who does this might be shocked at the results.

Please join us next week when we look at ridiculous animal laws in Utah!

An InLinkz Link-up

Law information source: stupidlaws.com, dumblaws.com, and realstrangelaws.com.

silly state law saturday: tennessee

We only have a few more weeks of Silly State Law Saturday to go. I feel like I was getting used to these ridiculous laws. Then came Tennessee.

• "Crimes against nature" are prohibited. I will not throw stones at birds. I will not throw stones at birds. I will not throw stones at birds...

• Stealing a horse is punishable by hanging. Perhaps if you hop on that horse, you can outrun the law.

• It is illegal to gather and consume roadkill. I think I just threw up a little.

• You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile. Correct me if I'm wrong: Automobiles can't go in water. Whales are in water. Water is not in Tennessee.

• It is illegal to use a lasso to catch fish. Yee-haw. Shucks. No roadkill, and now no lassoed fish? What the heck am I supposed to eat?

• The definition of "dumb animal" includes every living creature. Huh?

• Skunks may not be carried into the state. Simple work around for this one: get a leash, and he can walk across the border himself. Duh.

• In Knoxville, all businesses must have a hitching post in front of their buildings. Doesn't this just give the horse thieves easier access?

• In Lenior County, when you pull up to a stop sign, you must fire a gun out the window to warn horse carriages that you are coming. Because, once again, the purr of a car engine is much more frightening to the equines than is a gunshot.

• In Memphis, it is illegal for frogs to croak after 11 p.m. If I was in law enforcement, that's the security gig I'd want. 

• In Nashville, no person may keep a cheetah as a pet. Sweet! I can keep my panther.

• Any person crippling, killing, or in any way destroying a proud female dog that is at large shall not be held liable for the damages due to such killing or destruction. So I guess if the bitch has low self esteem, we're held liable? 

• It is illegal to own an albino deer. Where do you even find one of those? Tennessee, I guess.

• It is a crime to cast the rays of a spotlight or headlight on a deer. Especially if it's an albino.

• Dove-baiting is a crime. These hunting laws make no sense to me. 

• Using batteries to kill a fox is a crime.  Because that's an efficient method. 

• Snake-handling that endangers one's life is a crime. I'm thinking one may not realize this until it's too late.

• Using dynamite to catch fish is illegal, and each fish caught is a separate crime. I'm no pyro, but after seeing this law in a few states now, I'm beginning to wonder how dynamite works under water. I'll ponder.

• It is illegal to hunt animals from a plane. Especially baited doves and albino deer. Better to shoot those from a water-ready automobile.

• Training coon dogs is limited to certain parts of the year. So not only is there a hunting season, there's a training-for-hunting season?

• One hunting big game, except wild turkeys, must wear at least 500 inches of fluorescent orange clothing. Well, I guess that means my florescent orange bikini is out.

We'll see you back again next week when we take a look at Texas!

An InLinkz Link-up

Law information source: stupidlaws.com, dumblaws.com, and realstrangelaws.com.

silly state law saturday: south dakota

I gather from South Dakota's laws that they must be pretty big on hunting. Take a look at their ridiculous animal laws:

• No horses are allowed in Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. Again? Perhaps I should have been a horse pants maker. Or did they mean "whores? Because that would make more sense. 

• It is a crime to molest a mink den. As it should be. Say no to fur.

• One needs a license to hunt with a raptor. But without a bird of prey, you don't need a license?

• Shooting animals from an airplane is illegal. For those who want that extra challenge...sorry. You're out of luck. 

• You can not use spotlights, except to hunt raccoons. Theater productions must be rather dull.

• Dogs can not be used to hunt big game, except for mountain lions. The new reality show: South Dakota Dogs vs. Mountain Lions. I guess hunting mountain lions requires all the help you can get.

Join us next week when we take a look at Tennessee.

An InLinkz Link-up

Law information source: stupidlaws.com, dumblaws.com, and realstrangelaws.com.